Monday, January 10, 2005

Are you a cookie cutter?

I've been thinking about ~rich's post a while back about "Christian fads" and not conforming. It made me think about my life and how I used to be a "cookie cutter Christian." I had commented about how there is so much more to the Christian life than what we see or even know. It's really cool because God has changed my life so much and has pulled me out of my Christian bubble that I had been in for so long. Yes, I had faith, but it didn't become my own until I left home and found it for myself. For years I had based all my beliefs on what people told me was true. It's not that they were wrong, per say, but my heart had not sought out God on it's own. God broke me and showed me that my foundation was not strong because it wasn't built on Him. Suddenly everything I knew seemed worthless and I had to start over. I started to see how Christianity had become this thing that people were doing. It was like they were playing a game - "do this ministry, say this prayer, join this mission team, etc..." There was nothing real about it. I didn't really want anything to do with it. I thought, "If this is what it's all about, then I want out!" But God was so relentless in His love to me. When I wanted to give up, He didn't. It was basically a three-year battle with Him, off and on. Slowly and surely, He began to rebuild what was broken down. I have learned so much about what real faith is and what it means to love without condition. I have also learned that even though you go through a low point - even to the point of questioning and fighting everything - that God will hold you so tightly and give you hope when you least expect it. I am still learning, growing, and waiting for my heart's desires, but I know beyond a shadow of a doubt what I truly belive in, and I know it for myself. I know that now my faith is real because my God is real.

Through the past few years, I've written so many songs about where I've been in life, what God is doing, or what I've been learning. This song, "Know You More," is one of the many which describes what I have learned about the Christian faith.

Know You More
By Carey Kornegay

If I could bring you something
That's more than religious words
There is more than something
Beyond these superficial walls

You call me softly
I feel it in everything
Truth is all around me
I know it's not the same

If I could find a way
To know you more
You can have your way
Open my heart's door
Again

Seeing so much deeper
Within these sugar-coated lives
Drawing me away from
What I used to know

You call me softly
I feel it in everything
Truth is all around me
I know it's not the same

If I could find a way
To know you more
You can have your way
Open my heart's door
Again

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